METTEL RAY

My Top 5 Worst Movies of 2015

Nothing like a bad movie to ruin your day, or your week and if it festers in your mind long enough, it might even spoil an entire month. And yet, I’m drawn to them like a moth to a flame, even though watching through them is torture and not the fifty shades kind of way. This is a list of five 2015 releases that I saw and have regretted watching ever since.

Dishonorable mentions: Naomi & Ely’s No Kiss List, Barely Lethal, After the Ball, Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials, Royal Night Out, The Longest Ride. 

5

TOMORROWLAND

Considering the possobilities, and based on the hype it managed to create for me, Tomorrowland was the biggest disappointment in 2015. It had so much going for it, and yet, it felt empty and dull, which is an achivement in itself for a futuristic science fiction adventure movie.

4

INSURGENT

If anything, I should praise the Divergent series for being consistently bad because even its second installement didn’t do it for me. Frankly, I can’t even remember what exactly happened in the movie and how it ended. The only positive thing about Insurgent was Shailene Woodley with all her on-screen boyfriends which created one of the funniest memes this year.

3

INTO THE WOODS

The reason I didn’t review Into the Woods was probably because I didn’t really watch it, nor finish it. It wasn’t even the singing that bothered me, it was the messiness of it all, the pile of fairy tales it retold and the pile of crap it created. The best part, the iconic sing off called Agony between two dudes. The worst part, that Meryl Streep got nominated for her role in a very bad Disney movie.

2

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY

This is what happens when you write a bad book and nobody seems to notice: they make a bad movie out of it! The good thing is, Jamie Dornan with a beard is hot, the bad thing is, some idiot thought he should shave it off to play Dorian Grey. The worst thing though was the lack of male nudity in a movie made for women! I got to see Jason Segel’s manhood in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, I witnessed Fassbender’s holy body part in Shame, and yet, Fifty Shades of Grey gave me a single shot of booty and the rest was just tiny boobs. Disappointing.

1

FANTASTIC FOUR

With a cast that is filled with brilliant actors, it’s an eight world wonder to mess up an action movie that bad that I literally could cry! Fantastic Four reboot was the worst thing that happened to 2015 and it’s better to pretend it never happened. The best thing about Fantastic Four were the few moments of Jamie Bell’s precious face, and the worst thing about it was that I actually spent money to see it on a big screen.

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28 responses to “My Top 5 Worst Movies of 2015”

  1. Kat Impossible Avatar
    Kat Impossible

    I kind of liked Fantastic Four, even though it just seemed like an endlessly long prequel. And I definitely liked Insurgent, but as for the others, I totally agree!

    Reply
    1. mettelray Avatar
      mettelray

      I just am not a big fan of the Divergent series for some reason. Cause I have a personal.agenda against the series. :/

      Reply
      1. Kat Impossible Avatar
        Kat Impossible

        Okay. I like the movies better than the books, because I did not enjoy them all that much, so maybe that’s why I don’t mind the films so much.

        Reply
        1. mettelray Avatar
          mettelray

          I think you might be right. I disliked Fifty Shades partially because the book was horrid as well so I guess there’s always some connection to the book in an adaptation.

  2. Brittani Avatar
    Brittani

    I haven’t seen any of these. The lack of male nudity in 50 shades was such a terrible idea when their target audience was sexually frustrated soccer moms. I don’t get it. Was Doran afraid to? He seems so wooden anyways, maybe they should’ve cast someone better.

    Reply
    1. mettelray Avatar
      mettelray

      Lucky you! Dorian was not afraid I think.. he was more naked in The Fall wherr he was a lot hotter as well. Like, damn sizzling!

      Reply
  3. sati Avatar
    sati

    Just be glad you didn’t see Knock, Knock 🙂

    Reply
    1. mettelray Avatar
      mettelray

      I think I dodged many bad movies last year.. hence the reason this list is so short.

      Reply
  4. Keith Avatar
    Keith

    Fantastic Four was #2 on my Worst Movies list. It was such a stink bomb. From the writing to the direction and even the uninterested performances, none of it worked for me.

    Reply
    1. mettelray Avatar
      mettelray

      I expected so much more… so so so much more and it failed on every level.

      Reply
  5. Sofia da Costa Avatar
    Sofia da Costa

    See, the thing about Into the Woods… the idea for the plot and the musical numbers I found superb, but then, that work was already done by Sondheim, so the film can’t take credit for it. What didn’t work was the adaptation process: like you said, it’s a total mess.

    As for the performances, it’s like some actors got the memo to be theatrical (e.g. Streep and Pine) and others didn’t. So I don’t think Meryl was bad, I think she was misinformed. When she drops the witch mannerisms, towards the end, she’s very good. And her voice, man, that woman has great vocals.

    Anyway, it was such a disappointment. I was hoping Ron Howard would put his “Nine” days behind him with this, but I guess not. For the life of me I cannot understand how he manages to fail so spectacularly when everything is laid out perfectly for him.

    Reply
    1. mettelray Avatar
      mettelray

      I didn’t know the background nor I have I got that much knowledge about musicals etc. so for a complete outsider, it was a mess. To have a movie, that’s a mess, no matter what the background, is a bad thing. It didn’t have the fluidity, it lacked connection, and I felt like it didn’t know where it stood. Was it a drama or a comedy musical? Was it sarcastic or heartfelt.. I just.. it felt like they had an idea, and they had the actors (most of them amazing on their own), and they just pushed them in front of the camera and said, sing these songs, and that was about it.

      Reply
  6. ruth Avatar
    ruth

    YES I agree that the ‘Agony’ segment is the ONLY good thing about Into The Woods. The rest is well, agonizing to say the least, it’s too bad there are so many good people involved. It’s a bummer about Tomorrowland too as it has a great concept and Brad Bird is usually a good director.

    Reply
    1. mettelray Avatar
      mettelray

      Tomorrowland’s promotional tour was amazing, so much power, the opening as well, great, and then the movie just lost its appeal and direction somewhere after the 30 minute mark.

      Reply
      1. ruth Avatar
        ruth

        Yep, exactly! Hey Getter, hope you’ll take part in my monthly series, so pop over when you get a chance.

        Reply
        1. mettelray Avatar
          mettelray

          Popping over right away!

  7. Katy Avatar
    Katy

    Nice list! Poor Divergent series. I’m not a fan of the books at all – they are very convoluted and poorly constructed. Believe it or not, the movies are a ton better. Oh, 50 Shades. I was drunk seeing it the first time to squash any memories of reading the books. I’ll be drunk for the second one too – if that’s ever even made.

    Reply
  8. Andrew Avatar
    Andrew

    Tomorrowland was such a disappointment! You are right on with that one. I expected so much more…it had SO MUCH potential…and it just fell flat.

    Reply
  9. Nostra Avatar
    Nostra

    Yeah, have seen three of these movies and like you wasn’t a fan of Tomorrowland. Divergent really was disappointing (did enjoy the first one myself) and Fantastic Four…what the hell happened there!

    Reply
  10. ninvoid99 Avatar
    ninvoid99

    Wow, I saw 2 of these films on TV. Insurgent is just fucking stupid. It’s really one of the worst films I had ever seen where it seems like it tries too hard to be important and say something. Instead, it wastes a lot of talent and puts them in idiotic situations. Fuck that shit. Fifty Shades of Grey is just horrendous. Take away the emotional elements and fully-realized characters from Secretary and take away the playfulness of 9 1/2 Weeks and this is what you get. Plus, it’s a very misogynistic film in which the girl is begging for it while the guy looks like he’s had a dildo shoved up his ass.

    Reply
    1. mettelray Avatar
      mettelray

      Right on! I agree with these statements and though I would like to defend Jamie Dornan, who I still like, I can’t based on Fifty Shades. That’s his worst movie and I guess he just did it to be noticed in US… as I think he is already well established in UK.

      Reply
  11. Big Screen Small Words Avatar
    Big Screen Small Words

    Tomorrowland was disappointing, it really had potential. Into the Woods was also awful, only the Agony number was a good part.

    Reply
    1. mettelray Avatar
      mettelray

      Right? Agony was the best, I wish all the musical numbers were a bit more silly. You’ve seen Galavant? That’s how I imagine Into the Woods should have been.

      Reply
  12. Wendell Avatar
    Wendell

    Yeah, Fantastic Four was horrible. None of it worked. Fifty Shades was just as bad, if not worse. Sadly, Dornan was a huge part of the problem. That was one of the most horrible performances of all time. Insurgent and Into the Woods were both bad. Tomorrowland is interesting to me even though I haven’t seen it, yet. I’ve seen it on a number of best lists and worst lists. So, I’m real curious about it. Great post!

    Reply
    1. mettelray Avatar
      mettelray

      You know, I can’t hate on Dornan for being bad, I mean, have you read the book? You can’t create material to act from if the book is so bad. Then again, I feel like he was pushed into it, I feel like he didn’t really want to do it but some dude said, no, you’re doing it! And you shall shave off that beard to look like a 16 year old. I just.. so much bad in that movie.

      Reply
  13. Courtney Young Avatar
    Courtney Young

    No Jurassic World!? I’d definitely add that to the list 😉

    Reply
    1. mettelray Avatar
      mettelray

      Nah, Chris Pratt alone saves Jurrasic World for me.

      Reply
  14. abbiosbiston Avatar
    abbiosbiston

    So glad someone else thought Into the Woods was crap!

    Reply

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